Death in the Business of Whaling

  • I am not invincible 
    I am measuring things 
    I am watching the walls again 
    Collapse everything 

    I've been here for a long time 
    I try and I fail 
    I am still in the belly of the whale 

    And I know what you're thinking 
    How did you get here too? 
    I don't know any better than you 

    And after the plummet 
    Sinking into the grey 
    I am left in the stomach
    At the bottom  
    Where I lay

  • Well, do you kill what you eat? 
    Gutting a fish for the family 
    The cost of living with yourself is enough 
    It's never letting up 

    How do you sleep in your clothes? 
    Dirt on the lawn
    Are you hungry?
    A rotten apple hasn’t always been that
    I want my body back 

    And do you always kiss the ground 
    When somebody lets you down? 
    Fighting like an insect 
    That nobody wants around 

    Shovel the ice when you need to 
    Breathe through your hands to keep warm 
    I broke knuckle but it’s not the same at all 
    At least I broke the fall 

    But if you go down swinging, I won’t 
    Sick in the gut and blood in your nose 
    If I can handle breathing smoke 
    And the sound of a bottle being thrown 

    If you want it now, just take it then 
    Said “you have to be kidding” 
    You were laughing then 
    The air is on 
    The cat got out 
    Something else is missing 
    I'm an outlaw now 
    I’m speeding out 
    The air is cold 
    I'm breaking things  
    I swear I've never felt so old 
    If I say “it's not really all that much” 
    I’m cutting out the heart of the fish I caught 
    On the lake I made 
    On that very place 
    I could’ve broken through the ice that day 
    But I'll never know, cause I ran away 
    And left you there to take my 
    Place 

  • I've pulled it up
    From the root and far beneath me 
    Solid enough 
    Give me anything, please 
    I've seen it happen 
    You forget your words without me 
    Poisoned and unlucky 

    Mmm, mmm 

    Photograph of a cyclone 
    A spirit 
    Moving cycles  
    Masterpiece 
    Destroyer of what’s in front of me 
    Old machine 
    Headlock 
    Wasting hours in outlaw country 
    Sing the anthem 
    Absentmindedly

    Mmm, mmm 

    You lay down to sleep, dreaming  
    Treading careful  
    God, you look so evil 
    Letting some big monster in the room  

    You can’t mean it 
    No one talks like that without their reasons 
    Pardon my affliction  
    Won't you 

    Like that’s the worst you’ve ever heard  
    And I go quiet when you’re mean to her 
    Sit there  
    Wordless  
    Like you do 

    God awful  
    Without permanence 
    I convince myself to need you 
    Circling the corner of the room 

    Mmm, mmm 

  • Damn it 
    I only left for a second  
    Now everything’s changed and I let it 
    Damn it 

    Walking home 
    Without your friends 
    Because no one knows 
    You could’ve lied with your eyes closed 
    I know 

    I saw it 
    It was bleeding like somebody had shot it 
    Like someone’s hunting it down and they lost it 
    Or maybe it was just for sport 

    I am a killer with a heart on fire 
    I'll be the hunter when you tell me I need to be 
    Point at the center, right between the eyes 
    Doesn’t it kill you watching somebody bleed for me? 
    Doesn’t it? 
    Doesn't it? 

    Fall asleep 
    Back of the car  
    Out of Eugene  
    Sweeten the way that you talk to me 
    Like sonnets 

    It’s a forest 
    Sucking the juice from an orange 
    Lay in the street when it’s pouring 
    It's like a dream to me 

    I am a killer with a heart on fire 
    I’ll be the hunter when you tell me I need to be 
    Point at the center, right between the eyes 
    Doesn’t it kill you watching somebody bleed for me? 
    Doesn’t it? 
    Doesn’t it? 

    Damn, you can’t understand 
    I would rest my head somewhere warm 
    But I can’t stand the quiet anymore 

  • Don’t you wanna ask me how little I know 
    In the grass outside the fence where it’s all overgrown 
    And it’s not feeling any better 
    The same clenching in my throat, oh no 
    And the wolves, they will surround you ‘til the circle is closed 
    Chewing holes into your sneakers when you get too close 
    And it’s delusion, but it’s peaceful 
    That this body is not your own 

    ‘Til the ground pulls you down 
    To the dirt I knew  
    We’d always come back to  
    And how do I feed you?  
    And will you keep this up  
    ‘Til something completes you? 

    It isn't better when you leave 
    But the lines are all but drawn 
    And you can’t see  
    The path that you are on 
    And all of a sudden  
    They’re cutting the wings from off my back 
    Head on the sofa 
    Hands in my lap 
    I want it back 

    ‘Til the ground pulls you down  
    To the dirt I knew  
    We’d always come back to 
    Oh and how do I feed you?  
    And will you keep this up  
    ‘Til something completes you? 

  • It’s nothing 
    A trick of the light 
    At the poolside 
    Not the night that was promised 
    A pretty good view though 
    You probably grew up being dishonest 
    What else could you do though, it's all that you knew 

    What happened in August? 
    A change in the mood 
    When they look at you 
    Not enough that you noticed 
    But what else do you do in a dark room? 

    If I sell you out 
    Is it so bad 
    That you're still asking if she hates you now? 
    Slow down 
    Kicking and screaming 
    I really need you to help yourself 

    You know me 
    Well, you think that you do 
    Cause I know you 
    I smile politely  
    You are a small bird, I’m a cat on the loose 

    Likely 
    To get what you wanted 
    I should’ve just known it  
    You look so happy 
    You're waiting for no one  
    And I follow you home 

    I'd sell you out  
    Is it so bad  
    That you’re still asking if she hates you now? 
    Slow down  
    Kicking and screaming  
    I really need you to help yourself 

    She answers in the pouring rain 
    “I just don’t love you” but it sounds the same  
    As every answer in the plan he made 
    I say his name 

    And just by some sort of coincidence 
    He drove his car off of the river bridge 
    They never found him and they haven't since 
    He’s dearly missed 

    I sell you out 
    Is it so bad 
    Are you still asking if she hates you now? 
    Slow down  
    Kicking and screaming  
    I really need you to help yourself 

  • Junie wants what’s best for me 
    And I don’t ask why  
    I know better than to waste her time 
    Junie says the problem is I don’t even try 
    Every time she asks a question I lie 
    And it’s barely winter but I’ve made up my mind 
    There is nothing else left to decide 
    Have you learned nothing from the pain in your side?  
    Are you holding out for dear life? 

    Radio signal couldn’t find me on the roof 
    It only tells me bad news 
    Keep that in mind 
    Say what I know to be true: 
    “I think I’m bad for you” 
    And I really meant it this time  
    Leaving without saying goodbye 
    Move in with my grandma by the seaside 
    I want a whole ‘nother life 

    I tried a million times 
    Keeping you, needless, in the back of my mind  
    I tried picking my fights  
    And checking your breathing through the end of the night 

    In a few years 
    When the ink dries  
    I will be here 
    Starting fires in the front yard 
    Through the sickness 
    I was the safeguard 
    But you fell too hard 
    I am wishing 
    Is it making sense 
    I can fix it 
    But it won’t hurt you less 
    What is missing? 
    I made this mess from a distance 
    It’s gonna take me next 
    It's the creature that's moving at a terrible speed 
    It's believing you’ll wake me if I’m falling asleep 
    I have dreams where I’m grasping something out of my reach 
    I am screaming for nothing 
    Saying “what am I doing now?” 
    Saying “what am I doing now?” 
    Saying “what am I doing now?” 
    What am I doing now? 

  • You never had it 
    I never got it back 
    I saw you wasting everything you ever had 

    In violet 
    Bargain your life for a flower 
    The last of your honor 
    To die thinking you were a coward 

    I loved you wrong 
    In the sinking sun 
    Said I was a god and I'm not sure that you bought it 
    The earth moved on and I'm scared of the thought 
    That I'm selling you on it 

    I had it 
    I want it back 
    I’m gluing the pieces into a book I have 
    I know that it’s sweet 
    Black cherry pit 
    I know what it eats  
    I know it exhausts me to carry it 

    I loved you wrong 
    In the sinking sun 
    Said I was a god and I'm not sure that you bought it 
    The earth moved on and I'm scared of the thought 
    That I'm selling you on it

    On a sinking boat 
    Why don't you know 
    That a plant won't grow in 
    The dead of the ocean 
    For the sake of all that is keeping us floating 
    And our eyes open 
    A running engine 
    Through to the ending 
    A divine omen 

    I loved you wrong 
    In the sinking sun 
    Said I was a god and I'm not sure that you bought it 

    I loved you wrong 
    In the sinking sun 
    Said I was a god and I'm not sure that you bought it 

    I loved you wrong 
    In the sinking sun 
    Said I was a god and I'm not sure that you bought it 

  • You do not have to be anything better 
    But my darling, you cannot live like this forever 

    Like wild geese 
    Flying towards something 
    You do not have to do good  
    But you cannot do nothing 

    The animal; watching  
    And letting you live 
    You cannot offer up something that was not yours to give 

    And I’m doing the talking 
    How I do in my sleep 
    Just forgive me for wanting 
    Everything that you need 

    And I'm pretty as ever 
    But it’s never enough 
    What is chasing you brother? 
    What is testing your luck? 

    And there’s a hole in the center 
    You can see through the crack 
    It was there when you left  
    And it will be there when you come back 
    When you come back 

    I will not lay me down in front of the tracks  
    If I swore that I meant it, 
    Then I take it back 
    I’m running water, overflowing the bath 
    Something lost in the center  
    Turns the water black 

    When you come back 
    When you come back 

flush

  • I am starting to resent myself
    I’m watching you across the room
    and I am powerless to stop myself
    From slowly turning into you

    There’s a satellite above my house
    I think it watches over me
    If it could know me from the inside out
    You’d be the only thing it’d see

    So if this is it
    You said it when you chose this
    I don't wanna miss the plan
    How you wanna live
    When nothing makes you hopeless
    Holding it with both your hands

    Say you learned the hard way
    You don’t like to be alone
    Prayed on by some new kind of paranoia
    So you don’t pick up the phone  

    When it all comes down to it
    You were right I was wrong
    What if I got my fishing lines all tide around your throat
    And you died there in that pond

    This is just a description 
    Of the daughter you made her into 
    You made her out of pieces of you

    It’s the body’s affliction
    It’s the pain making circles in you
    Like dogs that just wanna get loose

  • Is this the face that you gave to me?
    Do I belong to myself?
    Am I the same when you look at me?Or am I somebody else?

    I watch the movie you play for me
    I am the face on the screen
    I put the words where they’re supposed to be
    I would do anything to be seen

    Turn out the lights and go back to sleep
    Wait til the water runs clear
    Living through winter and apathy
    Watch me as I disappear

    Is it the way that you pictured it?
    Is it enough that it’s clean?
    Already washing my hands of it 
    I would do anything to be seen

    When the old thing dies
    Carry the rest inside
    All on fire
    Watching you pull out the knife

  • I am especially nauseous on days like these
    I don’t think you even tried to knock the wind out of me
    There is a part of me somewhere that is entirely sweet
    Though I am not really sure if it’s a part I still need

    And what’s the worst thing about me being so weak?
    I have a permanent toothache and a cut in my cheek
    I spent a lot of my years afraid of who I might be
    It was the end of my rope
    It was the scrape on my knee

    And I don’t think it’s worth a damn
    What you think about me now
    I could ask you who you think I am
    But I don’t really wanna find out

    Do you think time’s gonna leave me at the foot of your door
    Laying out while it’s freezing on the same damn porch
    I wouldn’t think it’d be easy being sweet anymore
    But I guess part of you needed me to keep yourself warm

    And I don’t think it’s worth a damn
    What you think about me now
    I could ask you who you think I am
    But I don’t really wanna find out

  • Fit me in your pocket
    I was always looking for a friend
    And you wanted me to ask you anything
    But didn’t wanna spoil the end

    Maybe this was all an answer
    In a long line of thought
    Maybe this is the end of the good part
    Or maybe it’s not

    It’s the feeling that you’re coming home to
    Rest all you’ve been standing on
    I’ll be anything you turn me into
    I will be your favorite song

    It gets sunny in the afternoon
    Maybe you would like some tea
    Or we’ll dance around to Tombstone Blues
    Run away with me

    Maybe we just have to try a little bit
    For another chance at this
    Maybe I was letting go too quick
    Before I knew what I had missed

    It’s the feeling that you’re coming home to
    Rest all you’ve been standing on
    I’ll be anything you turn me into
    I will be your favorite song

  • The weight of it’s pulling again
    And you have to give in
    This once

    It’s all in the back of your head
    Just as bad as you thought it was

    It’s coming undone I think
    You’re almost right back where you were

    You’re living the same morning
    Thinking it’s just supposed to hurt

    So I’ll scream until you hear me say it
    This has never been your fault
    And I’ll make you say it to me
    When you’re praying with your back against the wall

    They take everything
    Or nothing at all
    Nothing at all

    The weight of it pulls me in
    I know the way back

End Of The World

  • Aren’t you tired
    I know I am
    Do you still want me here
    In the space between you and your hands
    We shrank the summer down
    To 24 miles
    I can still hear the sound
    Of you laughing all the way down

    We built a tower
    Out of water and sand
    Make it taller than both of us
    And we tear it apart with our hands
    Look at us, carefree
    As we destroy what we made
    I love you carefully
    And I act like I’m dumb for my age

    And I know we’re older
    But she still makes you cry
    And just because she told you so
    It doesn’t mean that she’s right
    And it still gets ugly
    And you still bite your tongue
    But you still have more fight in you
    Than you ever really did when you were young

    Give it up for plain Jane
    There isn’t really much to say
    She’s faster than a bullet train
    And what you tell her she will take to her grave
    “Can you see the laugh lines?”
    She holds her face in the mirror
    She says it like nothings wrong
    But I can hear her disappointment from here

    You think you look older
    I think you look alive
    You were right before when you told me
    Living takes more than to just survive
    What’s a word for lonely
    That doesn’t mean alone
    And what’s that thing you told me
    Something I would understand when I was grown

    I don’t know what I heard
    Or what it takes to forgive
    You were mad at the whole world
    You were angry it didn’t stop when you did
    I am building something else
    It’s not something I will tear down
    I will make it myself
    And i’m too proud to break the promise
    I’d do anything but ask for your help

  • There is a crow that I can see on my street almost every day

    He lets me watch him there as long as I stand far away

    And as long as I am quiet

    My honey leaves him with a present 

    Something shiny

    Something glistening

    And we wait for him to bring us back another thing

    And we can’t believe he does

    I have more than enough

    It’s not halloween anymore

    The colors changed

    And you don’t have to wait by the door and

    There is no reason to be someone else

    Your costume’s in the basement at the bottom of a shelf

    I have more than enough

    Sometimes I’m scared that I’ll only ever feel everything once

    And I can never feel the same thing cause I change too much

    But I still call it the same name and

    Hey I was there

    In the same body that you were

    Watching everything

    You wouldn’t talk even when somebody was listening

    Cause you didn’t have the words

    Well I have more than enough

    For the both of us

    I am

    Getting close now

    I can feel it

    The cup is almost

    Full now

    With all the shiny things I have now

    I’ll show you how (x6)

  • You are the collector 

    Running out of room

    I am gonna be there 

    When you do

     

    When you were a baby

    You knew what to do

    When you needed somebody 

    To help you

     

    You are the collector 

    I am just like you

    Folding into places 

    That were never really meant for you

     

    I can’t make you hate me 

    No matter what i do

    You weren’t always angry

    But i’m always gonna lie for you

     

    Oh, what a lesson

    In shutting you out

    I have to listen

    In case the house falls down

     

    I’ll be the witness

    As they’re pulling you out

    And the neighbors are watching

    Saying this was bound to happen somehow

    It must’ve been coming for years now

     

    You are the collector 

    Running out of room

    I am gonna be there when you do

  • Funny how it disappears
    The second you give in
    When the world comes to terms with the way that it spins
    Funny how you rearrange how your mind begins to change 
    Hold yourself a little tighter in the arms of your old age
    And when nothing else is working 
    And the air is gettin thin 
    I will hold on like the first time 
    Feel the pulse beneath my skin

    I can feel it, I know it’s true
    I cant heal what I hold on to

    I wish I could make the promise 
    I am this and nothing more
    But there’s a holiness in finding I was something else before 
    And I held my head in water 
    Like I wasn’t scared to drown 
    Like I knew when it was over 
    I'd be finished looking down

    And am I someone you believe in 
    Can I trust what I can see
    I am alive and breathing 
    You won’t take the rest of me
    I can feel it I know its true 
    I can't heal what I hold onto

    Give me a minute 
    I need another quiet day 
    My hands are shaking in the worst way
    Give me a minute or two 
    Maybe a year would be enough
    I'm still deciding if it’s worth it for all this stuff


    I can feel it, I know it’s true
    I can't heal what I hold on to

  • I make the end of the world
    Out of asking 
    Out of patience 
    You know enough of the words
    I was angry
    You’re forgiving

    And does it get too hard
    Being a good person
    Every day of your life

    Does it gets boring 
    Making a living out of the things you like

    Without the rain
    You’re in a bad mood
    Or is it lightning
    Or is it the wrong shoes

    And it’s ok
    I’m grateful to you 
    For letting me lose

    And it’s a damn shame 
    You’re good at winning
    And I can’t handle when the fight runs out

    When it’s the chapter 
    From the beginning
    Crashing a boat into the front of your house
    I know you don’t like the sound

    I ran away to the golden state
    Just to see if I could get back home

    I know it’s not what you thought I’d say
    I’m hardly brave, I know 
    What do you say to a brand new ghost

    I saw the end of the world last night
    I ran to you
    I say a name in the warmest way
    I look for you
    When I do

  • You drove me to the water
    And I didn’t even swim
    You wanted me to have some fun
    And I’m sorry, I meant to
    I did

    And it’s hard to believe it’s still
    The beautiful thing that it is
    I wanted to be everything 
    And I will
    Cause I want it still

    And it’s alright
    That nothing calms down
    As hard as I try with my feet on the ground
    I buried my teeth 
    In everything good
    And it didn’t save me like I thought it would

     

    I can’t write anymore
    I have a shadow over my door
    And it’s not kind anymore
    It doesn’t love me like before
    And I don’t cry anymore 
    Except when I do which is most nights
    And I’ll try not to lie anymore 
    Or call it a symptom of fight or flight
    Wish I didn’t take the money
    When I did
    Wish I didn’t hate the city in mid July
    Think I must’ve been somebody
    At some time
    But you promise you can see me and you don’t lie
    But this is not mine anymore
    It’s giving you time like it always will
    I don’t wanna die anymore 
    There are hands to be held and drinks to be spilled 
    And I can and I will 
    You stand in the kitchen making me still
    Cause I can and I will
    I can and I will (x4)

    (And it’s alright if nothing calms down
    Hard as I try with my feet on the ground
    I buried my teeth into everything good
    And it didn’t save me like I thought it would)

    But I can and I will
    I can and I will

House Song

  • Tall white house with an empty room

    And your name carved over the door

    Facing out to the tallest view

    From your place on the second floor

     

    Sound it out to an empty house

    Was it just like you had before

    Savior pulled from an open mouth

    Did you want to be something more 

     

    Now your taller than you’ve ever been

    There’s a mark on the wall, you see

    I’m sure that someone will draw a new one

    And paint over it before they leave

     

    Mark my words there’s thousand things

    That don’t wash out with anything

    I keep you clean you surrounded me 

    And my windows are breaking

     

    Something is rotten inside of me

    I have to find it and 

    Cut it out

    Cut it out

Guard Dog

  • I wanna be roadkill
    Find me a mile up ahead
    Lying there on the roadside
    Say "Don't worry now, it's already dead"
    Pick me up like I'm fragile
    Carry me to the nearest tree
    Or bury me under gravel
    Just deep enough so nobody finds me


    I've tried to describe just
    How carefully I would carry you
    And maybe I'm crazy
    But some part of me had to care for you


    What if I give up too soon?
    A racehorse with nothing to win
    Running just cause I'm supposed to
    Cause they bet too much money on it
    And I've got nothing to fight with
    But I'll do it cause you asked me to
    A guard dog with a death wish
    In the center of the ring, I lose


    I've tried to describe just
    How carefully I would carry you
    And maybe I'm crazy
    But some part of me had to care for you
    What would it take for me to be cared for, too?

  • I was honest for the second time
    I guess that wasn't really what you had in mind
    Said that you could like me if you wanted to
    Then followed me around until I talked to you
    And could you tell that you were scaring me?
    Called me crying
    Said you thought you were in love with me
    Cut my hair enough that I wont look the same
    Maybe it gets easier in seventh grade
    I'd already had enough then
    I already gave an answer and still, it wouldn't end
    you didn't care what I said
    Guess it was just another rule that you could bend
    We used to be friends
    Even at my best, I'm still just small to you
    Dragged me halfway down the hall cause it was easy to
    What a funny feeling when you're pushed around
    You don't even know you're falling til your on the ground
    I'd already had enough then
    I already swore to be the person I'd defend
    Carry me to the deep end
    What could be worse than having nothing to depend on?
    We used to be friends
    You were just waiting on the call
    I never cared for it at all
    You were so hopelessly dissolved
    I never wanted you to take the fall
    Take the fall

  • After the flood comes
    You and I know
    There will be waves
    Enough to carry you
    And when the moon moves us
    Out of her sight
    I'll play the songs
    Like the ones she dances to
    Oh darlin'
    Oh darlin'
    Will you still walk me home?
    It's gonna rain soon
    And pull me back in
    Whatever it takes
    To fill the shape I'm in
    And out of your own hands
    And straight into mine
    I had the words
    You'd thought a hundred times
    Oh darlin'
    Oh darlin'
    Will you still walk me home?
    Can my feet touch the bottom?
    Can see it from all the way down
    Son of a goddess
    Who makes the most beautiful sound

  • I've been moving
    In slow motion
    Keep the lights on
    So nothing comes in
    And the prettiest parts
    Are the ones I see
    When the lightning starts
    Will you know where to find me?
    I was trying
    To be honest
    I was hoping
    The house was haunted
    I still keep you
    In my locket
    Don't you ever wish the house was haunted?
    The day I swore I
    Saw an angel
    Making faces
    From the table
    Made me question
    What I believe in
    Was it my reflection
    Or somebody looking through it?
    I was trying
    To be honest
    I was hoping
    The house was haunted
    I still keep you
    In my locket
    Don't you ever wish the house was haunted?
    I don't have a lot to say
    But I'm still talking anyway
    I am the master of mistakes
    I missed the point you tried to make
    And I'd forgotten what it felt like
    To be living like you're dead
    I am a picture in a movie
    In a moment in your head
    I was trying
    To be honest
    I was hoping
    The house was haunted
    I still keep you
    In my locket
    For the day I find the house is haunted
    For the day I find the house is haunted

  • I don't know what steps to take
    I do the easy ones until it helps
    Little acts of conversation
    I don't think I really like myself
    Am I comfortable in silence?
    Or is it eating me alive?
    Nothing's ever really quiet
    When you need distraction to survive
    It's part of me
    Wouldn't you believe it's nothing?
    It's all you need
    When you keep the rain from coming
    I'm already going under
    Nothing I can do but sit and wait
    Are you really having fun or
    Do you like becoming what you hate?
    Am I comfortable in silence
    Or am I waiting till it ends?
    Nothing's ever really quiet
    You were just too stubborn to pretend
    It's part of me
    Wouldn't you believe it's nothing?
    It's all you need
    When you keep the rain from coming
    I'm good at letting you go
    I'm good at letting it get to me
    I'm good at letting you go
    No, you were never the enemy

  • I used to feel it when I'd wake up
    The thing you never had to name
    I made a life I don't remember making
    Couldn't just let it stay the same
    We look much different in pictures
    At least that's what most people say
    I used to know the person I took after
    I must've let them slip away
    Cause I wanna know you again
    And I wanna hold you like you needed then
    And I wanna know all you know
    So I can take what you can let go
    I turn the pages with the seasons
    And leave behind what I can't change
    Until there's nothing left that I believe in
    I'll leave it just the way it came
    I'll write enough so it can hold me
    Until the feeling has a name
    I wrote the ending but I missed the story
    I must've been just out of frame
    Cause I wanna know you again
    And I wanna hold you like you needed then
    And I wanna know all you know
    So I can take what you can let go
    Don't you wanna know me again
    Don't you wanna know me
    Know me again
    Again
    Again
    Again

  • I guess you thought I could fix the problem
    You said, "Tell me all that I'd miss."
    I don't know but I'm pretty sure it gets better than this
    And maybe I should've stopped believing but I
    Really wanted to try
    Said I'd saved you
    While I'm barely staying alive
    And I knew it the second
    You walked the door
    Yeah I had a bad feeling
    I started a war
    I'm gonna fuck it all up
    And I'll probably pay with my life
    And I know that you told me
    That everything's fine
    But I wrote this story
    Before it was mine
    And I know there's a villain
    But I'm worried it's me this time
    So fake a better feeling
    Take me as I am
    At least I'm only making better plans
    Turn me into a believer
    Make me out as some old healer
    I'll change for the better
    And I'll even make it last too
    For you
    For you
    For you
    For you
    For you
    For you
    For you
    For you
    Turn me into a believer
    I hardly recognize myself either
    I'll change for the better
    And I'll even make it last for you

  • Do you think about dying?
    I wanna know what you would say
    And would you tell me if you're lying?
    I couldn't stop you anyway
    We've been watching movies
    And I've been talking to myself
    I'd like to think that you knew me
    Better than anybody else
    I know you're probably standing there
    Wishing that I wasn't here
    You know I'd follow you anywhere
    So do you honestly believe
    That I would let you disappear?
    I've been sleeping with the lights on
    And I've been standing at the door
    You were so easy to hide from
    But I don't do that anymore
    And I fixed up all the broken things
    And I've been carefully content
    Pretty soon I'm gonna say something
    That I'll eventually regret
    I know you're probably standing there
    Too far to fall off the edge
    I would've followed you anywhere
    Cause if I loved you at the start
    Then I would love you at the end

  • Find me in the raincoat
    You could've sworn you were missing
    We don't talk the whole way home
    I leave the coat in the kitchen
    Let me have a few more months
    I'll talk to you when I'm ready
    Say "I never got to lose it once"
    So I do and you let me

    But is this coming clean
    Or am I kicking up dirt where I shouldn't?
    And what's it gonna mean?
    I can't fix all the things that you couldn't
    Do I just end up losing my footing?

    But I don't wanna be your angel
    Wanna see you cut off a limb
    Nobody wins
    If I kill you
    Would I have to forgive you still?

    Sterilize the thing you know
    Give it to somebody who's strong
    Fallout from the glass you broke
    There's still a piece in my palm
    And just like that, we're starting over
    Just when we were getting into it
    Fake your death and call it closure
    Just like we would do when we were kids

    But is this coming clean
    Or am I digging up the bodies you buried?
    And what's this supposed to mean?
    Am I brave if the noise doesn't scare me?
    If I make myself easy to carry?

    But I don't wanna be your angel
    Wanna see you cut off a limb
    Nobody wins
    If you killed me
    I would have to forgive you still

    I would've died for it
    I would've died for it
    I would've died for it
    I would've died for it

  • A dress to be buried in
    Take the rest from me
    What could I still need?
    What is rest to me?
    I'll take the city train
    To where it used to be
    Shelter from the bleed
    Of the old dragon tree
    And when the autumn comes
    And it starts mending
    What you took it from
    You don't know the ending
    It's impossible love
    But you keep on trying anyways
    Till the feeling fades
    The feeling fades
    The feeling fades
    Matches to light the flame
    I'll help you burn it down
    Even take the blame
    We're really in it now
    We'll plan a new escape
    Run until we can't
    Story for the ages
    Hand in unsinkable hand
    And when the autumn comes
    With all its endings
    Just the bitter ones
    So I keep on pretending
    It's impossible love
    To keep you from trying anyways
    Would you believe it's fate
    And everything's different
    Let me take it from here
    It all starts with a lesson
    But you don't hear it
    Make any difference
    The mission's never been more clear
    We're not all dying here

  • Talk to the moon
    While I wait for a ride home
    I'd stay but I don't wanna bore you
    I guess this can wait
    You'll be there when I get home
    You're all I can see from the rearview
    Stay right where I can see you
    Count all the places
    I think we should run to
    Somewhere with nothing to do
    It's always too loud
    Hope the noise doesn't scare you
    I don't know what else came before you
    You must know that I just adore you
    And I want you to have it all
    All you ever needed
    The minute that you fall
    And I wanna be a savior
    I don't wanna need anything
    When you're all that I've got to lose
    Stay on the line
    I just want you to be here
    I still see the light through the window
    Wait for the tide to come in
    And my feet hurt
    We walked all the way on the same road
    I promise it won't be too long though
    And I want you to have it all
    All you ever needed
    The minute that you fall
    And I wanna be a savior
    I don't wanna need anything
    When you're all that I've got to lose
    But don't you ever tire of all that?
    Picking up the pieces
    You don't have to be alone
    When you're the place I wanna go
    And if you ever wanna fall back
    I'll let you go
    But when it's said and done
    I'll be the north star that takes you home

  • Is it just like me
    To say this?
    Just what you'd expect
    From the latest
    Version
    If I knew what it was I would tell you
    If the door wasn't shut
    I'd let you in
    Take your sweet time
    I'll give you all of mine
    Take what I can get
    And let you have the rest
    What do I do here?
    What do I do?
    Am I
    Too sad to be here?
    Am I
    Too sad to be alive?
    I don't wanna be
    I try
    But I wanna stay alive
    I do, I do, I do
    At least I try to
    Want to
    Do you have a place for me
    Do I have to become smaller
    Would you see me differently
    If I made myself taller instead?